Updated: Aug 12
What a Pandemic and Social Media has left us longing for.
Women are craving connection, support and positive mindsets! Not an episode of The Real Housewives of anywhere, the absolute worst depiction of female comradery and realism I have every seen. I actually react emotionally be it annoyed, or angry, watching these women who are far beyond the mean girls days of high school. Don't get me wrong. I do get hooked on watching their lavish homes and seeing their stylish clothes, but would you ever want to live that life? Not I! I want to hangout with the real women, who don't want drama, who want to connect and truly support each other. I just want to be my introverted self, have a few great friends and be supported and support others, like really supported.
If you are lucky enough to have a great childhood with parents who supported and encouraged you, then you were taught to seek out that support as adults and also to provide it. For those who did not have this same experience, that compassion, support and connection is still something that you crave despite what you may actually tell or show people. Your trauma response is to go into survival mode, and for many of you, that is all you know how to do. Because you don't know if it is safe not too.
Social Media is not helping this situation. It has replaced real conversations and genuine emotion. It has removed the "real" out of our daily lives. But it doesn't have too!
"People raised on love see things differently than those raised on survival" ~Joy Marino
After being in a pandemic for two years you might have gone through a period where you felt very cut-off from friends and family, and most importantly your support systems. You may have spent countless hours on social media as a result, and that my ladies, can eventually lead you to burnout. It can be overwhelmingly exhausting. I mean how in the world as a Business Woman can you possibly do all of that and successfully run your business. If you have felt this way, then I feel you. What women need and truly want is something "real". You want compassion and support and connection that is so damn positive that it empowers you. It transforms a gloomy mindset to one of motivation, it helps you to feel safe in this gigantic world of reality and online.
I am proposing that you seek what you want and need.
That you begin to transform the way you rely on social media to entertain yourself, to pass time. Social Media can be a place of mass support, mass connection and mass compassion if it is used in the right way. How can we possibly do this? #1. Remove what no longer serves you- Decide today that if social media is affecting your mental health, your mood, your stress level that it has to change. If you are giving up time with loved ones, limit your time. If you are getting stuck in the rabbit hole of social media likes and followers, again, limit your time. #2. Connect with likeminded positive women online and in person. Women who believe in you and will refer you to others without even being asked. I am not talking about annoying "like for like" or "follow for follow" posts. I am talking about genuine, authentic and real connections which happen with introductions and conversation like back in the olden days. ;)
#3. Delegate the Marketing and Content Creation of your business on social media to a Marketing Professional. Not a social media manager- it is important to understand the difference. A Social Media Manager will just "manage" not take the lead, develop a marketing plan, create the content etc. If you want a short-term solution to try it out, check out Fiverr or Upwork. #4. Attract what you need- If you want your social media accounts, groups, profiles, to be a part of this authentic and supportive, genuine connection. Then create that for yourself. If you want to have real friends, real support, real lunch dates with a supportive group then you yourself have to decide that this is what you are going to offer also.
#5. Get excited- my last new client did not come from my paid advertising, my hours of what feels like pointless posting on social media. She came from a referral, from a supportive, authentic and genuine friend who does not even live in the same country, and who I have never met in person. It is proof, you don't have to do what everyone else is doing.
Your social media connections should leave you feeling energized, motivated and supported .
A great place to start is The Ladies Lounge Facebook Group. This group is different, it is not a dictatorship of what can be posted, a walking billboard of promotions. It is real women in business with real struggles, authentic friendships, mass positivity and who want to feel supported and support others. I hope you are thinking about how you will reinvent your social media purpose so that it truly serves you, and fulfills your wants and needs. Let me know what you think of this article in the comments below! Melanie Ireton